Ever wondered why things were so good between you and your partner, but after being together for some time, things are so difficult and complicated? Truth is, even happily married couples will hit obstacles along the way. That’s quite normal. And it doesn’t have to mean your relationship is falling apart, but it does mean you need to attend to this change in order to continue enjoying a flourishing relationship.
For many couples, a difficult obstacle is just that – an obstacle. Like a snag that needs to get untangled. Some couples navigate this on their own successfully without professional help. BUT, sometimes professional help is either nice to have or very much needed. Couples can either go it alone and try to work through problems themselves, or they can seek guidance from a trained and experienced marriage counsellor. While some individuals and couples feel their problems should be kept private, many more are finding the value of seeking help from an impartial and nonjudgmental therapist.
3 Ways Individual Counselling Can Help Your Marriage
Identifying Behavioral Patterns
Many of us are aware of our partner’s behaviors but less aware of our own. And yet, many marital problems are the result of the patterns between the couple; i.e. both partners contribute to these patterns. But when you only see one side (i.e. your partner’s) of the dysfunctional patterns, the problems in the marriage can seem confusing and overwhelming.
A therapist is trained to help individuals recognize their own negative patterns and how they manifest in the relationship. The result is that both partners are empowered and able to take a step back during conflicts as they occur, and thereby preventing hurtful escalation.
A therapist can also point out the strengths and resources they find in your relationship so you can leverage and learn how to nourish them.
Change at the Root Level
Once your therapist has helped you identify negative patterns, they can then help you understand why they are happening and assist you in changing them. Most behavioral patterns are formed and ingrained when we are very young – before we become self-aware and before we’ve met our significant others.
Understanding why you react a certain way can create empathy and aid in better communication. Once you’ve laid this solid foundation, your therapist can give you specific adjustments that can change your relationship for the better.
A therapist will not only tailor changes based on your unique dynamics as a couple, they will also help you practice the adjustments and encourage you to remain vigilant and consistent. The result is a deeper intimacy and a deeper understanding of each other with a renewed commitment to meet each other’s needs and desires.
If you or a loved one is interested in exploring treatment, please contact me today. I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help.
Would love to hear from you. Feel free to call or email me today to request a FREE 15-minute phone or video consultation.